| Caiti Jayne |
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Writing about who I am has got to be one of the hardest things on the planet. When I think about writing about who I am, I feel overwhelmed by all of the things I might forget to mention. I also feel overwhelmed by all of the things I do mention but worry about wording them in just the right way. It's important to know who you are, and know yourself as well as you can, but in life I've always believed that it is an individual mission within each of us to spend our whole lives learning about "who we are," and in the end, we may never truly know. So for now, to give you some kind of scope into who I am, I'm going to post a silly little note I posted on Facebook on February 10, 2009. It was one of those trend note-games, where you're told to write 25 things about yourself, and tag 25 other people and make them do it, too. Here are my 25. 1 - I am insanely chatty and love conversation; I have the ability to talk forever about anything you want. 2 - I hate the feeling of being full, which is why I always eat things in small amounts, so I can always stay slightly hungry, which I like so much better. 3 - I don't watch TV, listen to the radio, read newspapers or magazines, and only occasionally watch movies (with friends because it's what people do). I just don't like the "media." 4 - When I was a little girl I hated dresses and dolls and anything super girly. If someone tried to get me to wear a dress I would throw the worst screaming tantrums you've ever heard of in your life, and whenever I saw a doll, I would literally pick it up and biff it across the room just because of it being in my presence. (You don't want to know what I did to Barbie). 5 - I drink tea every day because I have this idea in my head that it soothes me. It's one of my favorite things and I can't go a day without it. 6 - I am a straight up Gemini and firmly believe that if you looked up any definition of a Gemini woman it would be a very accurate description of who I am. 7 - I once went about a year and a half without eating nachos. Seriously. Not one. 8 - I am very much like my mother. Her and I are cut from the same cloth. If I didn't have a good conversation with her every now and again about "life" and people and things, I would probably feel very alone, because I don't know anyone else who shares the same insights and beliefs about life as I do, and who tries to explain it in the same way. 9 - I've always secretly wished I could've been a better daughter. 10 - I love dancing. I dance every day because I really can't help it. 11 - When I was little, I would not play with any of my toys on Christmas morning until everything was arranged perfectly into a glorious display. 12 - I don't drink pop and I don't eat fast food. 13 - I believe in never burning your bridges with people. Even if you don't like them, you always stick it out because you never know when you are going to need a hand. It's a little shady, but in life you always have to look out for yourself, and nobody else, first and foremost. 14 - As a chit chatty person, I'm good at playing up the social niceties and small talk, but secretly I think it's just a bunch of bull, even though I do it all the time. 15 - I live to laugh... If I think you're funny, there's a good chance I will either A) become your little admirer, and/or B) love you for days. 16 - Technically, my real name is not just **. It's ** **... And that is because when I was little, my mom gave me the choice of whether or not I wanted to get my name changed to my step-dad's. I kept ** only because I was being a polite six year-old to my real dad and thought that cutting it out would hurt his feelings. Even though I never really knew him anyways. 17 - I have three half-siblings that I've never met, all on my father's side. I have a half-sister who's in her mid-thirties but I don't know her name, and another half-sister Zoe who is nine and I've seen pictures and talked to her once or twice. I also have a half-brother Wyatt who is one. 18 - I think I will always see myself as an artist, even though I have no idea what my "specialty" is. I have a feeling it's gonna take me my whole life to figure it out. Which doesn't make sense, really, considering I'm planning on being a dietician when I'm older. 19 - There's a text document on my computer that I've been adding to nearly every day since September 2005 (15 yrs old). It is just over 1 MB in size, made out of only words, which in Microsoft Word translates to 455 pages and 181,807 words. It is comprised of notes, writings, quotes, conversations, lists, night-dreams, thoughts, lyrics of songs, things I have said, things other people have said, amusing things, sad things, beautiful things; things that make me laugh or cry, things I need to remember; essentially it is made up of the words of my life; anything at all, both important and unimportant. At first it was just a temporary file to store shit on. But then I just kept adding to it and I never really stopped. It's now a never-ending time line of all the small thoughts and big dreams that go in and out of my head on a daily basis for the last 4 and a half years... 20 - I love writing. I have been writing since I was 8 years old. I went and did a count of how many journals and notebooks I have and holy shit I could start my own library. ! I have about 47 journals: 29 of which are complete, 14 are still on the go, and 4 are empty. Jesus H. Christ like what the fuck do I even write about... 21 - I love change, even though there is a careful, shy part of me that is completely resistant to it. 22 - I love being alone and can handle it well for extended periods of time. 23 - I am a fervent night owl and will stay up every night, on purpose and for no reason at all, even if I'm completely exhausted. Most nights I'll go to bed at 2 or 3, some nights 4 or 5. Most nights I stay up just to think. I don't know what it is but I love being awake when everyone else is asleep. 24 - I'm obsessed with food, though I don't eat very much of it. I'm usually curious about every food label there is, and while food shopping, will tend to want to read all of them. I'm also good at sizing up whether something is healthy or not healthy in the span of about 10 or 15 seconds, and can calculate calories mathematically in my head down to the decimal point. I like to look at it more of as a skill than as something a crazy person would do. 25 - I am quite flighty and tend to start and do many things at once and never really finish any of them. For example, I've been meaning to complete this "25 Things" note since about two weeks ago, but have just never actually finished it in one sitting. Hurrah. Last updated Mar 9 2009. |